Joke Daquan

 1. A male deer, it walked, getting faster and faster, and finally it becomes the highway (deer )!!!!< br> 2. Two tomato cross the road, a car sped past, One of them was crushed less than dodge, the other tomatoes are squashed tomatoes pointing laughed: wa ha ha ha, tomato sauce, h 3. wolf said: guess, how?
put the results of the big bad wolf eat the lamb.
4. stones and cake fight, took a kick rocks into the sea hhhh
cake scored a pair of former lovers private set for life, but the boys need to perform military service, they and the girls set the oath, to the girl a diamond ring, and promised three years later and the girl meet, that time, the ring as a wedding ring. finally 3 years later, girls have been waiting for boys, has been not wait, she was too sad, desperate thrown into the sea, her diamond ring, breakaway. However, the fact that boys have been waiting for the girl, but the girl misunderstood dating sites, so it will never become a regret. boys heartbroken h over the years, the boys go fishing, guess what he caught?
cake!!!
5. dumplings is a boy or boys as girls
dumplings are the answer foreskin
6. has called the Little yellow ducks, the day he was hit by a car, he cried: br> 7. matchstick head suddenly felt itchy to reach out and scratch, scratching scratching put his burned h
8. Once upon a bird
him through a corn field every day
but unfortunately
one day a fire broke out patch of cornfield maize
have become all the little bird flew past the popcorn
after hh
that snow, cold in death h
9. When will want reunification of Taiwan?
buy instant noodles when
10. Antony and Ebo Road without incident each time is getting chat.
Antony: age of the most happy is Children's Day. br> Abai: br> 11. all the soldiers: br> all the soldiers:
Cao Cao: advised her: ; father said: ? (assuming they speak)
because hhhhhh ..
because they are not familiar with hhhhhhhh
ah ~~~~~~~~< br> 15. Question: How to make the quiet sparrow? < br> Answer: It is about pressure.
reasons: silence (silent sparrow pressure).
16. an unfortunate students caught by the enemy, the enemy tied him in the poles, and then asked him: Where are you from? not talk you to death Electric!!! . A: kindergarten next door! Yeah. !

white friends do not believe you are obsessed with Spider-Man's English: spider man (white people)
20. Why does the Dominican fall?
please think twice hhhhhhhhhh ..
The floor was slippery thing
21. PARTY group of animals after the finish and ran into the 7-11 convenience store, because too noisy, the results are out playing staff, but the lamb left unattended inside the shop, may I ask why ?
24-hour convenience stores are not closing ah hhh
22. glasses and coffee mugs with the cross the road, when suddenly someone shouted: car coming!
results hit by a car glass, coffee cup, but nothing , I ask why?
cup ears ah!
23. a horse, said the company launched a grand new products, ass 3, referred to as MP3h
24. I hate two kinds of people: < br> One of racial discrimination;
second is black;
third did not know the number!
25. I want to thank Xiao Zeyuan moved toward the river blue, Nagase love, beauty of bamboo Ryoko, high Tree Maria, Kawamoto dance, worry about wood pupil, summer Mumei Xi, Qin ruler until the United States, Whitehead, Kudo Kwai, hill within the true from the, shore Sichuan Miho, Nishida Friends of the century, Sawai teeth, clothing, Fujisaki color flower, leaf mountain �� �� ki, Inoue Chihiro, Matsumura , yuki Shizuka Izumi, etc. I know these names and do not know the name, had appeared in my computer has now been removed or are still in the computer exotic friends: often the dead of night, is that they carry me through one after another lonely night; in the spirit of the most bad when I was their to comfort me in a timely manner; exhausted when I play CS when it is clear that they make me feel pleasure; in my state do not feel depressed when it is their HIGH whom my spirit up ~
26. Now seismic prediction accuracy did improve a lot, this time only a thin two words: predict, > 27. Jane Zhang said: > babe proposal: we give its name from the small bar, I called ; Huan baby words in 2058, the five Fuwa and chat together.
babe: we say that his nickname now, people are respected me, call me call me, to stand up and say: you talk, I have something, go first hh
29. winter arrived, and even decided to maintain the habit of cold baths, but wash the wash, even found that he was changing the way back to childhood! !!
30. celery walked, I suddenly felt stomach pain, then he !! Qin (food) What is the color of fecal ??????< br> Answer: Yellow
because: Qin Shi Huang (Qin feces yellow)
31. there is a fat man from twenty h.
roof jump h.
results become h..
die fat!!
32. Once there was pieces of bread, it felt hungry, put his eating.
Once there beer, it felt thirsty, put his drink ..
There once was a virgin, she felt tired, put his sleeping h.
33. ancestors who
peanuts Because peanut ~ ~ ~
34. ancient characters which were considered in white-collar workers do?
Mengmu moved three (thousands)
35. Zhang Fei: Yan Yan: Mala Ya after falling off the mountain is how to die?
answer: starvation. because too light floating down to ~ so long h
37. Diary of the world's most terrifying about the
which stay diary, the diary has been found to run out, he wanted to buy back out again to write, but has been at o'clock. but he got on my bike in the dark to find the streets, looking for a long time finally found a bookstore yet went in closing. There is a diary that he liked, and asked how much the boss.
boss with a very low voice said: ; so expensive Oh, but I only came out with 50. ;
boss is a very deep dark voice said: br> which stay, said: take a shower and then come out after the diary hh
bath, which stay even find the windows of the desk was opened, and the wind to blow diary of this one-page quick hh blown open when the last page, which stay forward to stop, but it was too late, the last page is opened by the wind of terror happened
hh saw which stay a scream as he saw the last page says:
( Please pull down)
hhhhh .. h
continue to pull the pull h.
.
. fast, then pull a little h
.
can, eventually, pull a little h
.
mm-Price read the last page: 3 per 38. a peach on the way to go, I walked suddenly said, my heart good hard ah!
a walnut on the road walk, walked suddenly said, my face a good thick ah!
a Coke on the way to go, I walked feeling very bored, suddenly said, I'm so cola ah!
a heating on the way to go , easily help pedestrians walked suddenly said, I'm so enthusiastic ah!
a key walk on the road, walked a sudden, I was Qu Yuan ah! happiness of the lock down for the sake ah!
A meter on the way to go, I walked a sudden, I was literati ah! no trace of her thousands of Baidu ah!
a tadpole on the road to go, I walked to meet the other tadpoles, suddenly walked said that we were not QQ ah!
married a hawthorn walking on the road, walked suddenly said, my face looks red ah!
a divorce on the way to go hawthorn, suddenly walked said my heart good acid ah!
remarried a hawthorn walking on the road, walked suddenly said, my stomach has a son, ah!
a tea bag on the way to go, I walked suddenly said, I want to be hot ah!
a dumplings on the road to go, I walked suddenly said, I want to be pack ah!
a lighter on the way to go, suddenly walked that my stomach was full of gas, to get angry ah!
a cockroach walking on the street, walked a sudden, I strongly ah!
a thimble on the way to go, I walked suddenly said, I Dinga!
an ice-cream on the way to go, I walked a sudden, I cold ah!
a spider walking on the street, walked suddenly said, I still want to lie online ah!
a fish on the way to go, I walked a sudden, I like diving every day, ah!
a Guan Yu was walking, I walked a sudden, I Riding Alone for Thousands of Miles ah!
an eagle on the way to go However, I went to meet a bear, walked suddenly said, both of us play ah eagle bear!
a compass on the way to go, I walked suddenly said, how do I get lost ah?
a earthworms go on the road, walked suddenly said, how do I find leg ah?
39. Once upon a silk sheets in the eyes closed I dream, I suddenly felt as if something was lacking,
heard I kept thinking The doorbell rang, and opened the door and saw the original is just about finished blanket will be back,
Simone said blanket silk hugged:
Brother ~ ~ You can come back, I have the cold dead ~ ~ ~
40. a German, French, and a Japanese mine to go to work.
boss is American, he is German, said: French said: Start doing manual.
few days later the Germans and the French people find the Japanese gone, looking for a long time, or before they decided to go back after work.
Germans began to work, the Japanese suddenly jumped out, br> loudly called:
: there is a hide and seek community, they have not found a head now hhh
43. red Q: When you stir the coffee with the right hand or left hand
Mei said:
red right hand, said: Oh, You're brilliant, are not afraid of hot, like I have with the spoon.
44. Do you know why the penguins live in Antarctica Why?
because they're cold h..
45. There is a sale no snack bar dumplings business,
so she went to ask how do gong,
Institute of Certified Public said: You have to find a fresh corpse to its bun into dumplings,
and then sell this business will be great, but the family had asked that they do not eat these dumplings, otherwise there will be a terrible thing happened.
tried the effect of really good boss,
so she go to find the body.
her son the next day to take lunch,
but could not find the refrigerator so he went looking to see,
found a lunch box he thought was his to take away the ,
did not think the box is the father leftover dumplings,
he look down at noon opened a hop,
morning why dumplings immediately obvious that the 10 becomes 5,
He tried to cover up and then opened the lid and into two of the!
know why?
because the dumplings on a stick in the lid.
46. a lumberjack to apply for a job
foreman: in front of you to try h the woods to see you a minute to cut a few trees h..
A minute h.
foreman: wow h. 20 h. a minute too much a h.. where you have to work?
workers: the Sahara Forest hh
foreman: I have only heard over the Sahara �� hh hhhhh ..
Workers Rights: The ah h.. Later Rights to change the name!
47. Wife: I'm blind, will marry you stepped on dog feces.
Husband: I was really blind will marry you step on dog feces.
dog feces: Oh my good luck! lay there have been two of you to step hh
48. a story, once upon a lifetime fixing a pair of lovers, but the boys need to perform military service, they and the girls set the oath, to the girl a diamond ring, and promised three years later and the girl meet, that time, the ring as a wedding ring.
finally 3 years later, the boys in their hometowns they heard a woman married to a boat news, he sad too, the ring thrown into the sea of despair, three days after the boat. boys to the street of small restaurants for dinner. served a fish. he pick up the fish bite and bite a Ying Ying things, threw a look, guess what he saw ????????< br> Fish bones!
49. One day, a teacher took a group of adopted children to the mountains of fruit,
he declared that: .
Teacher: ? : Ma! it fell into the sea Paozhepaozhao.
Therefore, it becomes a Ma, the result fell into the river. Later, he became It is several successive sets
car to run over, making him appear a good few black stripes.
result, it becomes companions, one day, it came to a factory, the result is transformed into raging As a result, all horses spared, no horse has become a world hh
then, a group of people could not help but after reading this joke to say: br> Finally, to commemorate this joke, it was compiled into a class, we call it cry ....< br> very sad crying ...
results ...
he ...
hair ...
buds ...
the .. .
53. One day, cook your stools black stool to see a lump of white,
black big asked: Why are you so pretty long so white?
white stool was so angry! < br> He said: I'm not a stool! my ice cream!!!
54. have a cat found a mouse h.
so sheep-like rush toward the mouse Ehu should he eat
But then the cat ate the mouse been h..
Why???
mice silly because you could not tell Tiger

55. a software company is hiring
this day , a dog ran candidates, supervisors feel very depressed and wanted to drive out the dog. the dog out of a piece of paper with a pen, it is neat to write a few words: Do not discriminate against animals.
Explorer know not an ordinary dog, out of curiosity, he decided to try.
Explorer out the conditions for candidates, which reads: 1. must be typed .2. must be programmed .3. at least proficient in a foreign language.
So the dog went to the computer before, it is skillfully playing an article, there is the preparation of a very complex process. and then came to head in front of the manager said: Meow!!
56. toothpaste sister often play fast and loose < br> at once with a soft bristled toothbrush
Columbia dating younger brother suddenly fall in love
any connection with electric toothbrushes have a new neighbor today
toothpaste girl: What is the name a date with me now ~ ~ .
snake said: : a romantic person,
since he knew she liked roses and cut flowers have a place to self-help,
buy cheap and beautiful roses after the self-help,
occasionally deliberately to buy eleven Rose gave her,
received flowers he sent, she is always happy to look puzzled inadvertently reveal eyes,
until one day she saw in the book, after the number of flowers on behalf of the florid know,
flowers not necessarily the number of pairs,
and ten representatives of florid rose really touching it!
But she still hopes to hear him personally say ,
was eleven she asked what the representative of roses,
he had only prevaricate.
he rose up to ask the flower eleven beautiful words,
flower growers say : flowers planted three decades, have not heard what the language of flowers!
flowers quite often heard to say to the man to the woman rhetoric,
So why do you put all eleven of each flower?
he asked, puzzled, flower growers, said:
because hhh
buy ten get one ah ~
59. One day Jesus was nothing to do, where to go hang around the entrance to heaven ~ walked to go ,
see a line of elderly people there are very familiar, like his father, Joseph ~
but he was not sure ~ so he decided to talk over with him.
Sir, Hello, may I ask what is your name ah? 'm quite sure ~ ~ So Jesus asked: Qiao ~ My father is a carpenter.
Jesus continue to ask: how do you know?? the Jesus said:
said: people: ha ha h
This is actually a very frightening and the most terrible songs h is its source, because this song has a little-known story behind the h
this North Village jade his father left no sense of h
jade so unwilling to see the people, and gradually closed. Even his mother and sister are not close to her h
only because it was the ugly as a kind of contagious plague. < br> The only way to accompany the jade smile on his face, only that the baby and always will. regardless of the morning the evening, holding it all the jade jade h
on the sad end of about fifteen years old when the Mood for Love due to world-weary sadness and sense of self, in their own room h
hanged himself at an early age but also because the closed-yu, no one will enter her room.
this way, until the body from the waist length hair to the floor, clothes changed from white to dark red, his mother was only found in h
Seeing his mother cried, in dealing with things after the mother has been unable to forget the scene at that time, she would prefer everything to their second daughter Lan fault.
this way, the increasingly frail mother grief, and finally in his 30 years of age, depression, death
still hold the baby before leaving, as if the think they will go along with her daughter a hh < br> things have died in the mother and child under the plain gradually.
cock crow, but the total time in the night, came the faint sound of h!
Mom! Why do you always do not stay with me? doll!
to quell fears, the generals sent carving the doll's face carved into the face of the cat (the cat as the mascot of Japan),
but in order not to make it sound (with the General himself is guilt on the concubine the daughter born of fear), the generals ordered not allowed to carve a cat face, mouth
this way, the doll house placed in the department spent over a hundred years h..
while in Door Policy After a series of wars, the massacre of a North village and exhausted, of course, was all the erosion of all,
this way, as foreigners in the eyes of Antiquities n dolls, are sold all over the
finally was removed in the past century the doll is open in the world, but the story is still little known and because of doll faces
to please, so very many wild products, the flow in the country.
collection of ordinary people, but it is only because of its agreeable appearance .
such a sad story with this baby, you must have seen, it is the kind of cop that the original human cat h.
ddddd (please pull in the end)
Hello Kitty!
62. The story happened in a long time ago in China,
friends scissors, stone, cloth, finger-guessing game to play the afternoon game
together to go home, I walked h
stone street out there is a note oil lamps to a similar kind of Aladdin's lamp
his curious pick it up, brushed the dust on the bottle lamp
suddenly cropped up slowly in the white smoke white smoke slowly emerging
out a Dragon .. Dragon ..
but dry, a little malnutrition
he spoke: I let you out
Dragon: ;
Dragon: ? We have tired every day, day of the finger-guessing game. Long cough a few times, three of who were in their spit saliva
three white smoke gradually began to be rolled down, the dragon is also gradually disappeared
Three Character Classic in bulk until the white smoke stone or stones to h
, scissors or scissors, is no longer only a cloth fabric, cloth has successfully turned human!
worry at a time of both joy,
just someone passing through here to see this scene,
took him down to the records,
this one is Mencius.
he wrote:
hhhhh.
cloth successful, become a man.
then remark posterity , also joined the Chinese teaching materials.
63. an old man died,
due to the Memorial, so the body freeze up with ice,
other public memorial and then when you come out.
just that when the weather is hot,
drops have occurred after thawing the body,
grandson to see in the next, very tense shouting:
one wish h.
God asked h
you have any desire to do h
heard of the man thought the cat has 9 h
Mania h
that you gave me 9 Mania it ..
God said ..
your desire to achieve slightly h.
day, that person is free, bored h
want to die a death there anyway forget h
9 Mania Well
h.
lay the tracks results over the last h.
a train or a dead man h
Why is this?
because the train station compartment with 10 h
65. flurry asked Dad: I saw Dad still feel twenty years of terror. 66. there was a lady, was driving a red light when half.
pol.ice side to see her looking at the traffic red light, green light to change red h
still parked in the road, moving not move.
so traffic police came to ask the young lady: feeling faint,
asked her why she is head down
not say hh
about what I do not know how to do, after all h.
feelings or can not be forced to listen to friends
She recently said
go with a man I can not believe
close
do not want to believe
as h.. I really like her hh
but h.. day in the
I was surprised to see the street with another of her hands and he
very close
laughing
instant
broken my heart hh hh.
After I The asking
know he turned out to be medical students h
family also opened a large hospital
my third class on the ratio of university students which A hh ..
the past few days I have been sleeping vain
still want to save feelings between us h..

decision for a long time I would like to send her an apple a day

because I believe
a day keeps a doctor away. If you speak slowly, we can listen to understand! A walk left onto the highway near his home run into bad luck h
police rummage h
Xiaoming called in the past for questioning.
police inquired as to why embark on a small highway, asking End After the delivery of tickets to his h
says
1. not wearing a seatbelt
2. unlicensed driving
3. speeds less than 60
70. beautiful must see Oh MM ~~~~< br> Coffee Diet:
Material:
hundred grams of coffee beans (raw)
water 500 cc h
practice:
1, drink 500cc of water. < br> 2, the coffee beans h.
.
Scattered on the ground, one finally picked up.
three times a day, repeat month h
71. Life is like a stool, once washed away , it will not come back.
Life is like a stool, how to pull all the appearance, but each time they are not the same h.
Life is like a stool, and sometimes pull a very cool, sometimes they pull features tangled!
Life is like a stool, you never know what will pull out a stool stuff ..
life is like, how the results you want, how we should be planted.
life is like stool is often hard for a long time, but only a few bursts with life is like fart ..
stool, even more beautiful embellishment, its essence is still the same ..
Life is like a stool, only a brave face in silence��.
So, as we often say
guy to the hospital to be examined, and has done a lot of testing.
doctor said: There is good news and bad news! read your test results, I find that you have potential homosexual tendencies!! and difficult to cure!
The guy said: Oh my God! good news that it?
doctors shy to say: I found you quite lovely yeah ~~~~~~~~< br> 73. One day a Girls physics teacher in a class on sick leave,
40 female students who are looking forward to be with the class,
to the physical class is a great guy actually male teacher,
a female classmate with a provocative language that : Can we do school teachers, some excitement exciting game to play it?
male teacher was silent child, said:
good ~ ~
the graduates of textbooks away and examination now!
74. One day, my sister crying cockroach cockroaches running back ..
father asked:
then cockroaches brother back, he look happy to say: